Sometimes I think WHY?

Sometimes I think why? Why have talents at all? Why be able to do any of the things my talents allow me to be able to? It doesn't pay to be an artist, at least it doesn't for me right now....It really sucks badly actually and sometimes seems stupid. Although I know that if I wasn't able to draw, write or act I would be one really, really depressed person as I found out months ago when I fractured my hand. I could hardly hold a pencil or type on the computer and it drove me crazy. But still, I get so jealous of all my heroes out there making it everyday in the profession I so desperatley want to be a part of. How did they do it? Hard work and persistance, I guess and maybe being in the right place or knowing the right people? Well I've got to get me some of that, you know? The hard work I've got and will continue to do so, it's the knowing the right people part maybe? I mean, I know the method of the how to go about getting a job in comics or being an author and I've recently figured out the correct ways to go about getting an acting gig. ;P Sucks, because sometimes I feel like I meet other artists or authors and I feel like yeah they have great advice for me and everything but like I feel like they don't want to help me. Or maybe they can't because they're just trying to make it or whatever...who knows?

I just felt like ranting for a bit...I know no one really likes to hear complaining but sometimes people like to read it haha! Hopefully things pick up for me, I'm trying desperately to get another job along with my lovely job at Target. I have to have two jobs in order to make it, my fiances job pays a ton but not enough right now, and sometimes to be honest not that much at all...Life hits you like an angry beaver slapping some wood sometimes doesn't it? My wedding is in like two months, August 5th and I am fucking pumped up about that!!!!! It's going to be sick, not to mention I am marrying the woman of my dreams!!! And the honeymoon is going to be off the hook in Florida! I love Florida so much, it represents in my mind really fun times on vacation heh. And we're looking into getting a house soon and what not too. So gotta have money for that as well, things will pick up though right? Maybe I haven't hit bottom yet though probably, doesn't seem that bad really, we're still making it in our way. Oh well, sorry to add more complaining on the internet, not like anyone reads this blog anyway though ;P Love to all peeps!!

New shizz going down folks...

Yeah so been busy laugh out loud; in all seriousness not that busy I guess. Pretty much looking for work to do around the lovely towns of Utica and New Hartford with no luck haha but who cares right? Work will come, I will make good money and I will get shizz done!! Beotchessss!!!

Feeling a little crazy today (I had two Arbys beef sandwiches) so excuse me hyperactive writing and general spazzing of the keyboard ya heard?! Been working mad crazy on my graphic novel, making all the pages shine and sparkle and slap in the face amazing because tommorow we are heading to Wizard World Big Apple Comic Con!! Woot! There are about four small companies there as to which I will be having take a gander at my portfolio-ness and hopefull will like what they see a little bit; I'm hoping that one of them offers me some kind of gig, I don't care what it is really!! Anything will do, even if they don't pay me yet....anything's a step in the door!! So yeah that's been going on.

Wedding stuff pretty much done and what not, tuxes and dresses were the last puzzles to the pieces so everything's all good. Super pumped up about that!!!

Also been doing some random art stuff on my computer with PSCS3 which is a blast I must say,random wallpapers, book covers, head shots and stuff always a blast!! Looking forward to doing more stuff like that as well soon. So yeah, wish me luck tommorow, I made copies and staples them together with my business card as well so hopefully they ask for a copy because that means they are at least interested in me. Plus I mean it's NYC right?! Going with the fiancee and some buddies who are just as pumped as we are for this trip!! Until somehting new happens or I decide to write something more once again, this is the end of this post ahahah!!